Friday Five

You have just won one million dollars:

1. Who do you call first?
My Mom and my Dad.

2. What is the first thing you buy for yourself?
A Cadillac ESV

3. What is the first thing you buy for someone else?
A Tahoe for my Mom.

4. Do you give any away? If yes, to whom?
Yes, to family. Actually it wouldn't be so much giving it to them as buying them things.

5. Do you invest any? If so, how?
Yes, I would invest most of it. How I don't know, I would have to either research the best possible way to do that or hire an investment manager.

Needful things

I have expensive tastes. Here lately I haven't been able to support those habits as in the past. Now, I just settle for adding things I want to my gigantor list. I was in Dillard's the other day buyin some pantays and of course I had to go by the perfume counter. Bad idea. I have been out of perfume for a long time now, and since I only like the expensive ones and would rather go without than wear anything cheap, I have been without for far too long. The new Cacharel Amor Amor caught my eye and my nose first. Then out of the corner of my eye I saw the familiar Boss logo. Me love Boss long time. So, I knew I'd like it without smelling it, but I had to anyway. Oh My Gawd. It's called Boss Intense and it smells like ... well, let's just say I got all turned on there in the big middle of Dillard's. I must have.

Not Atkins-friendly

Like me, Joelle is a little tired of the whole Atkins, low-carb business. She put it much better. I am still laughing my arse off.
As beautiful as she is, I'd dig him up for her. Yes, I have a crush.

Cold Weather Conversations

trapshootinguytx: my nuts were frozen..i walked all over campus
trapshootinguytx: in like 25 degrees..with a wind chill of 12 and wind like a muther
b0rderline_fo0l: well uh cover em up next time
trapshootinguytx: i did, i had jeans
trapshootinguytx: and boxers
trapshootinguytx: i would keep a hand in my pants if i could, might look funny
b0rderline_fo0l: well if they were frozen obviously you need more
b0rderline_fo0l: long coat? crotch scarf? put a sock on it?
trapshootinguytx: crotch scarf?
b0rderline_fo0l: yes, haven't you heard of those?
trapshootinguytx: no i havent
trapshootinguytx: can u locate one for me?
b0rderline_fo0l: i can have my mom make you one
trapshootinguytx: does it cover the nuts too? lol
trapshootinguytx: does she need measurements?
trapshootinguytx: lol
b0rderline_fo0l: that would be the crotch, yes
trapshootinguytx: ok, goood
b0rderline_fo0l: no, they are pretty much one size fits all
trapshootinguytx: ok, does she make these a lot?
b0rderline_fo0l: she will now
trapshootinguytx: lol
trapshootinguytx: call her now
b0rderline_fo0l: it's gonna be a revolution
trapshootinguytx: lol
b0rderline_fo0l: ok, what color would you like?
trapshootinguytx: hmm
trapshootinguytx: green
b0rderline_fo0l: ok, i'm on it

Wash Woman Blues

Laundromats suck. Big time. That is all.

Presidential Smack-Down

Well, ok, not really. My (politician thank ya very much) buddy Jay Dee Gee sent me this cool link here. If you are undecided about who to vote for, or if you just want to confirm that you are voting for the right candidate go to this here site and take the quiz. The results are interesting to say the least and might surprise you.

I'm #1

For anyone searching for "like peas and carrots" on Google or Yahoo. I was #2 on DogPile. But, of course, who is it that searches for that?

Another ranter

My buddy Josh has a new blog. Go check him out, I just gave him a new look.

In case anyone was wondering...

This guy is getting my vote.

no hatin'

In his final years, my grandfather suffered from many strokes, dementia, and extreme hard-of-hearingness (yes, I like to make words up). In one of his many visits to the hospital while he was still pretty much with it, yet exceedingly hard of hearing, the nurse was telling him what they were going to be doing to him. She was going down the list, and he was sitting there nodding. She asked him if he had ever had a catheter before and he suddenly became very indignant. "I am NOT a cat hater!", he tells her in a very offended tone of voice.

Cat hater. hahaha

My travels

Places I've visited or passed through (had to be awake and set foot in) in bold, places I've lived at least three contingent months in italics and bold.

1) Alabama 2) Alaska 3) Arizona 4) Arkansas 5) California 6) Colorado 7) Connecticut 8) Delaware
9) Florida 10) Georgia 11) Hawaii 12) Idaho 13) Illinois 14) Indiana 15) Iowa 16) Kansas 17) Kentucky 18) Louisiana 19) Maine 20) Maryland 21) Massachusetts 22) Michigan 23) Minnesota 24) Mississippi 25) Missouri 26) Montana 27) Nebraska 28) Nevada 29) New Hampshire 30) New Jersey 31) New Mexico 32) New York
33) North Carolina 34) North Dakota 35) Ohio 36) Oklahoma! 37) Oregon 38) Pennsylvania
39) Rhode Island 40) South Carolina 41) South Dakota 42) Tennessee 43) Texas
44) Utah 45) Vermont 46) Virginia 47) Washington 48) West Virginia 49) Wisconsin 50) Wyoming and 51) DC

Additionally, well, I have no additionally since I've never been abroad. Maybe someday.

As always put yours on your blog, in the comments, or email it to me. Come on people, I tell you all about me.. what about you?


Snagged from Skillzy via sugarmama.

Friday Five

At this moment, what is your favorite...

1. ...song?
That's a tough one, I like so many. Lately the one going through my head is Hit That. Love me some Offspring.

2. ...food?
Ahh food. Another toughie. I like it all. Today I am lovin me some salad blend with Butter Lettuce and Radicchio with BBQ Ranch dressing.

3. ...tv show?
Any Day Now, but I don't ever get to watch it. I wonder if they have it on DVD yet? My fave I do get to watch is ER but I have been less than impressed with it lately.

4. ...scent?
Snuggle Botanical Bliss fab softener. And Mr. Stopable's special blend cologne. Smells like candy. (why do I have that damn song in my head now, yeah, you know the one)

5. ...quote?
As you journey through life take a minute every now and then to give a thought for the other fellow. He could be plotting something. Hagar the Horrible ha!

If yer gonna spew, spew in this....

Today over at Mac's she wrote about something that brought back a disgusting memory for me. Go there and read her post and check the comments for what happened to me regarding that.

Rediscovery

I don't know how or why I fell out of touch with Sister Hazel. I remember them from way back, and loved their stuff. Cruising around on All Blogged Up the other day she had some lyrics and a link at the end of one of her posts. I liked the one she had thrown up there (Your Mistake), and made a mental note to check them out. I'm glad I finally remembered. These guys are so great. They have improved much over the years that I haven't been listening to them, and there are several songs on their latest album, Chasing Daylight, that speak to me. Most notably Life Got in the Way, Killing Me Too, Effortlessly, and Can't Believe. Pretty decent sorta southern alternative rock. (LOL) Check them out, you won't be sorry.

Postcards from the Barditch

In my previous post, I made a statement that isn't entirely true. I do have friends. Not many, but I do. I have become very selective about those who I surround myself with, to the point that I am not surrounded. So, thank you to those friends for being the kind of people who I can let in. I have been doing some thinking today. And some talking. One of my friends will not simply let me "be". He doesn't do it on purpose. (Well, sometimes he does.) He is the kind of person who makes me want to be a better me. Some of y'all know that trying to get me to open up about the really relevant stuff is like trying to do dentistry on a bear. I have become a represser and suppresser in the interest of self-preservation, because I have simply become too tired for all of the angst and self-discovery and the gettinupoffofmyassanddoinsomethinaboutitall. As I was sayin to him, I am at another one of those crossroads you inevitably come to in life. But, due to the afore mentioned tiredness, I have just been sitting here park. I am tired of going down the wrong road and having to either backtrack or detour. I am tired of going along, minding my own business, and being broad-sided. I am tired of coming to the construction, the traffic jams, and the idiot motorists who litter life's highway. Trite analogy, but it's all I can come up with at the moment. I have been shifting from park to neutral here lately, trying to get revved up to go somewhere. I know I need to. I keep running across people and words who make me think of who I could and should be. This morning over at Jett's, this post made me sit and ponder for a bit, and light a little fire of inspiration in my clogged up carburetor. And from there, I was led to this here post. That sums up a lot of my feelings. She says it much better than I can at the moment. I need a vacation, y'all. And I need that sit-down lunch we been talkin about, Jay Dee Gee. And I need to get in gear.

There's no place like home

For sure. I lived in one place for most of my life. I was born there, raised there, and swore I'd always get out of there. I've moved away 4 times, and for some reason or another I always ended up getting sucked back there. This time I've sworn I'd rather live on the street in a cardboard box than move back there again. So, why is it today I wish that I was back there? Ahh.. homesickness. I think that mostly it is that I am not happy where I am right now. Oh sure, I have a nice apt. and live in a decent enough town. But, it isn't going for me right now. I have not been able to find a job, and I have not been able to find any friends. I do not have any family in this town (save my ex husband and that doesn't really count). I'm lonely. I want somewhere that I can go visit if I am tired of my place. I want friends who drop by and hang out. I want my family close so that when I need them, or they need me, it's not an hour drive to get there. I want to live back in the country where it is peaceful and there are no neighbors and my kids can go outside and play and I don't have to watch them like a hawk. I could go on and on with the good stuff, but then I'd have to start listing the bad stuff. Not that I don't have bad stuff here. My problem isn't all situational. The usually rational adult me knows that. The scared little girl (who I never admit is still there) me doesn't care, she just wants to go home.

last night

i can still smell your scent in my bed
and though it is fading it reminds me of you
holding me
holding you
and i hate that i am holding this pillow
that smells of you instead
and that your presence is
all too familiar to me already
when last night
could have been just that

A Meme for you

What is the middle name of the first person you ever slept with?
Haven't a clue. What was their first name?

What kind of underwear are you wearing and what color?
Victoria's Secret high cut briefs, kind of a peachy/beige snakeskin pattern.

What is the song you want played at your funeral?
Amazing Grace.

What would your last meal be before getting executed?
Beans of Eternal Life

Beatles or Stones?
Stones

If you had to pick one person on earth who should die, who would it be?
I don't want that kind of karma hanging over my shoulder.

The person whose problems you would never want to hear again?
Mine.

What is the thing most important to you (as far as physical) about the preferred sex?
A pulse.

Do you secretly hate some of your friendsters but are too nice to reject them?
I haven't been on friendster since I registered, I doubt I have any friendsters

If you could have any super power what would it be?
The ability to heal by touch.

Favorite hangover cure?
Don't drink in the first place? I've never found a sure-fire hangover cure, so I don't drink anymore.

How many drinks does it take to get you drunk?
Since I don't drink anymore, I'd be a pretty cheap drunk. Back in the day, I had to hit the 10 or 12 mark to start feeling it.

Favorite Outkast lyric?
Everybody needs someone to rub their shoulders
And scratch their dandruff
And everybody need to quit actin hard and shit
Before you get your ass whooped (I'll slap the fuck out ya!)
And everybody needs somebody to love
Before its too late
Its too late

Hair color you most like someone you're dating to have?
Hair color isn't important. Hell, hair is optional.

If you had to be blind or deaf?
Deaf. I'd hate to not be able to see my children grow up.

Do you have any psychiatric problems?
Depends on your version of "problems".

Siblings that should go to rehab?
Health rehab maybe.

Least favorite month?
February always sucks.

First movie you can remember seeing as a kid?
Jaws. It was like 1975 and I was 4 and I remember it to this day. I still have a problem with boats and water I can't see in.

Favorite person in the whole world?
That would have to be me. No, really, I don't do favorites much. I don't have a favorite color or song or anything like that. I like variety.

When's the last time you went on a date?
When the Earth was still flat.

Do you like violent movies or dirty movies?
Yes.

Fall or spring?
Both.

Person you most wish you hadn't made out with?
I don't see the point in having that kind of regrets.

If you are straight, what person of the same sex would you do it with?
If I am straight I wouldn't be doing it with a person of the same sex.

Where do you want to live when you are old and brittle?
Somewhere with a great climate. Not too hot, not too cold.

Who is the person you can count on most?
I don't know, who? There are different people I can count on for different things.

If you could date any celebrity past or present, time and age are not factors?
Jesse James

What books have you pretended you've read?
I've read them all.

What's a word you would use to describe your life?
Conflicted.

Favorite drinking game?
The "try not to dribble it down my chin" game.

What did you dream last night?
I didn't dream last night, I was too warm and snuggly.

Favorite bands?
Rubber.

Speak now or forever hold yer piece

The comment function is back up and running now. Not that anyone uses it. (hint hint)

nanananananananana, and really bad eggs...Drink up me hearties YO HO!

You are The Cap'n!
Some men are born great, some achieve greatness and some slit the throats of any man that stands between them and the mantle of power. You never met a man you couldn't eviscerate. Not that mindless violence is the only avenue open to you - but why take an avenue when you have complete freeway access? You are the definitive Man of Action. You are James Bond in a blousy shirt and drawstring-fly pants. Your swash was buckled long ago and you have never been so sure of anything in your life as in your ability to bend everyone to your will. You will call anyone out and cut off their head if they show any sign of taking you on or backing down. You cannot be saddled with tedious underlings, but if one of your lieutenants shows an overly developed sense of ambition he may find more suitable accommodations in Davy Jones' locker. That is, of course, IF you notice him. You tend to be self absorbed - a weakness that may keep you from seeing enemies where they are and imagining them where they are not.


What's Yer Inner Pirate?
brought to you by The Official Talk Like A Pirate Web Site. Arrrrr!




Have I mentioned that my lastest fascination is Pirates of the Caribbean? I almost didn't watch it because of Johnny Depp. In fact, I didn't watch it until this month. Johnny D. has kind of put me off the last few years. The whole downhill slide after Edward Scissorhands and What's Eating Gilbert Grape. But, Orlando Bloom won out. Mmmm.. elf or pirate... I'd watch him anyday. So, color me shocked when my favorite in the movie was Captain Jack Sparrow. That part was made for him, or he made that part, either way.... I'm hooked. Aye! Avast!

When I rule the world

The World Is MINE! by Demonac
Name:
You will conquer:	Marguerita-Ville (now you get royalties every time they play that song).
Your title will be:	Emperor/Emperess
You will succeed by:	Sending back a computer virus from the future to eliminate the opposition.
Your Enforcers will be:	Jay and Silent Bob.
Your first act as ruler:	Bathe in your victims' blood.
Created with quill18's MemeGen!

You think you know

But do you really? Go here to find out how well you know me!
(as seen at Hunter's and Mac's.)